For My Angel
Blog entry by Lars Muhl from 9 January 2014
Look into yourself, you said, even if you knew that I was already in there and just wanted to break out. Look down at the bottom of the soul, you said, even though you knew, I was already down there, and was too little to wish for anything else but to fly up.
Oh Ishatar, how we ran. Over the endless grass of childhood. You were with me always, you walked with me in the rain and sat by my bed when I was ill. Where did we run to Ishatar, where did you go?
If I only knew all that now, that I knew then, I would never have believed all the lies: out of sight, out of mind. Then I had known, that you were with me in the prison in Jaffa, to show me, that the captivity simply was a caricature of the much darker prison, I since, brought with me everywhere.
Oh Ishatar, then I had not confused freedom with lies, not hidden my nakedness behind my foolish, pathetic mask. Then, I would not have been standing here so proudly, among all of my loose words, never have felt the need to comply with all their rules, with which they will determine whether one is little or big.
Then, I had not celebrated everything false and never killed anything but known that every parting just is the beginning of something new.
Now I know that I am nothing possible,without you.
Quoted from the book Shadow Travels, 1995.